Everyone dreams of an adventure. I have wished all my life for that moment when all of the sudden, I become free from all possessions, all responsibility, and I can just take off and go. I don't know where I would go. I don't want to know. The point of an adventure is that each step you take is a surprise.
But when that actually happens, I don't feel the ecstatic sense of freedom and joy that I thought I would. The moment I am uprooted from my comfortable little treehouse apartment, my job, and my cozy little town, I panic!
It's like I want to let go of it all, but I want to do it on my own terms and in my own timing.
But God doesn't work that way. He does things on His timing, and He does them on His terms. And that should comfort me. But because I don't see immediately what He has in store for me, I don't trust His plan.
Every time I find myself feeling that way, I remind myself of these things. God is Good. God is all powerful. God has perfect timing. Never once has my life spiraled out of His control. Each step I take is meant to draw me closer to Him. I have nothing to be afraid of.
It's only by this kind of preaching to myself that I can get past all of the fear and uncertainty that exists in my future. I literally don't know where I am going to be living next week. I have a job offer in Raleigh, but no housing. I have an apartment here that I need to sublease, and my sister and I are going to try to move in together by the middle of the month.
I a praying that God will let me keep up my pottery wherever I go. I have three galleries in North Carolina and one in Savannah, GA. I need to produce a lot of artwork in order to maintain these galleries and eventually make a living as an artist. I also really want to finish my 1000 pots mission. I am on #115.
Right now I am rushing to finish all of my pot sponsorships before I go. I have a wheel and I can buy clay wherever. But I don't know where I can fire yet. And I secretly hope to get a job in another art studio once I get settled in.